Owning It

(Check out the blog from today before this one HERE for Alex's er story, and my letter to my husband for Father's Day HERE.)


Even the most amazing church has things they need to work on. We are all still human, so we're all still prone to making mistakes and having areas of weakness. The church being a body made up of all humans, would then naturally be that way too. So why is it that it's so hard for most churches to admit that they have places that need work? I truly believe that when churches ignore their problems, it only makes the unchurched's argument that we're all hypocrites stronger. It makes us seem unauthentic and not genuine. If we would only be willing to admit to ourselves and to the world that we're doing the best we can, but we don't that we don't have it exactly right ... we might see more people that would be willing to talk to us.

That being said, I am once again impressed with the church we attend. There's a problem at our church ... we're just not growing. It's not that we're not genuine in our faith and our beliefs because we are. It's not that we don't have a passion for lost souls; we do -- we support and attend missions throughout the world. The problem is that we are so focused on taking care of each other, loving on each other, and meeting the needs of those we already have, that we don't pay as much attention as we should to those that aren't a part of our congregation.

Most churches would spend their time patting themselves on the back for taking such good care of their own. And we are proud of that. Most churches would pretend that this isn't a problem. But it is. And if this problem was addressed in most churches, it would be by the elders and ministers sitting down and forming a plan to correct it. Which we are doing -- sort of.

Sunday mornings our preacher is spending his time preaching about church growth and how it relates to us directly. He's being real, and honest, and not sugar-coating things. Sometimes, that hurts. But that doesn't mean that it's not necessary. Afterwards, on Sunday nights we've been having "round table discussions". As a church, we're identifying the problems -- everyone has a voice. We're brainstorming solutions -- again, everyone has a voice. And then people are volunteering to be part of a team that solves that problem using the general consensus of the members.



I'm not sure that I've ever been a part of a congregation that was so real and open. It's refreshing to see them latch ahold of this problem, and own that this is who they are, but that it needs to change. And it's personally inspiring to me.


I want to be a person that when faced with a problem, I own it. I own that I'm not perfect, that I can't be perfect, but that I'm doing the best I can. And then I want to be honest with myself enough that I can brainstorm solutions so that I can create a plan of action and implement it.

Right now, I'm owning that I don't spend enough time in the Bible. I hunger for more time with God, and I'm willing to admit that the only thing that keeps me from that is me. Now, that's not saying that I don't have perfectly good excuses for, but in the end, they're just that -- excuses. So I'm making a plan -- to turn off all sounds and clear the table, and spend 30 minutes reading and praying every evening once the kids are in bed. Instead of switching straight into "get ready for the next day" mode, after they're asleep, I need to set aside time for me to really concentrate and on my relationship with God.


What do you need to own? Do you have a plan for responding to that?

The Way a Church SHOULD Look

One of the things I'm super passionate about correcting is the way most churches respond to single mothers. In God's eyes, a sin is a sin. Each one separates us from God. Each one causes a rift in our relationship with Him. And each one is forgiven with the same grace and by the same act as the others. So when a young woman steps forward, admits she made a mistake, and then has the courage to stand up to the consequences and not discreetly get rid of it, then the church should rise up and support her. It should wrap their arms around her and tell her how much they love her, that they forgive her, and that they are going to help her as much as they can. They should be proud of her bravery and sympathetic with how much of a struggle she's going to go through.


Sunday morning my church was tested, as well as my love for my church. I love my church very much. I brag on what an amazing church family we have. I invite people. I try to get people from Texas to include Sunday mornings in their trip here so that they will have the time to visit our church. Our best friends are there. It is also the only place I'm guaranteed that Kairi will not have any major freak outs. So needless to say, when when this test came up I was terrified.

To protect her privacy, I'm not going to describe in detail the young lady or the family that went forward. But a young woman stepped forward. She had a note written to the congregation stating that she was sorry because she had sinned. She had hurt herself, her relationship with God, and the church. She admitted she was pregnant and asked for forgiveness. Then we prayed over her. One of the elders prayed over her. But before that elder prayed over her, he did something that I will always remember -- he took the story of casting stones, reminded us of it, and then promised her that we were not casting stones. He told her that we love her, that we forgive her, and that we will help her. He reminded her that God can do great things with our mistakes as long as we allow him to. Then he prayed for her, for her child, and for our church.

After the service she was FLOODED with people loving on her. They accepted her. They loved on her. And they held her close. I'm sure that there were a few that raised their eye brows. I'm sure that there are a few that won't treat her the same again. But in the end, the people that are leaders in our church, and most of the rest, stood up and loved her regardless of her mistakes. I know that she will be loved on and helped out and protected and taken care of by my church.

And THAT my friends, is what a church SHOULD look like. I praise God for the way it was handled.