Dear Neighbor's Handyman,

When I told you that you had access to the backyard to paint the trim on the side of the house you're working on, it did not mean whenever you damn well pleased. It meant that for that day you could enter and leave my backyard at will. It did NOT meant that you still had access to it 2 weeks later when you haven't even been at the house for the last week.

Also, when I reminded you today that you are supposed to knock and ask permission before working in my backyard, I did not mean EVERY FREAKING TIME you walk back there. I meant, this morning you should have gone "knock knock" and let me go "yes?" and you have gone "Do mind if I'm in your yard today to finish up painting?" and allowed me to say "yes you can. That's not a problem." Instead, you're knocking on my door every 15 minutes because you can't seem to remember to take all your supplies into the backyard at once, and apparently you're too stupid to grasp that I only need you to ask me ONCE a day. I would seriously think you're being a smartass if you weren't so damn nice about it every time.

So now, are we clear? Every morning you need in my backyard, ask me ONCE to go back there. After I've given you the all-clear, you can enter and leave at will. Then the next time, ask me again. I won't ever tell you no, it's just nice to know that I can't walk through the house after my shower w/ nothing but a towel wrapped around my body. See, not only would that embarrass me, but it would blind and horrify you. So for both our sakes, try to remember this. K?

Good, glad that's settled.

Sincerely,
Steph